


lies

by Mintiny



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Falling In Love, Hong Jisoo | Joshua is Whipped, JiHan, Love, M/M, i have no idea how these work, there is gonna be fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:22:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27916699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mintiny/pseuds/Mintiny
Summary: ❝you don't stand a chance at all.❞❝what do you mean?❞❝joshua hong, the pretty architecture student. you don't stand a chance with him.❞—where a simple bet led to many broken hearts.
Relationships: Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan
Comments: 7
Kudos: 30





	1. wronged

**Author's Note:**

> before we start, this purely fictional. i do not own any of the seventeen members and i will be changing the relationships in the tags above as we move forward for better experience.
> 
> thankyou for reading this!

colourful lights shimmering with its radiance reflecting almost to every corner of the room, too packed for its own capacity. loud music accompanied the lights that were blinking with an unknown rhythm.

with people shoving each other to people almost sucking each other's faces. there were varieties of them on the dance floor, some grinding against each other in a non sensual way while some genuinely having fun with their drinks in one hand and moving their feet to the beats.

the noises dimed down in the background for the blonde who was busy in his own world. his drink completely forgotten long ago, sitting abandoned on the edge of table, on the verge of falling down.

"jeongha-"

"shh..."

the blonde pressed his fingers to the other male's lips, climbing on top of him, his knees straddling his thigh. his hands roamed up and down on the other's arm, lightly stroking with his fingers.

"you ha-"

"i said quiet minhyuk."

minhyuk's breathe caught up in his throat, as the plump pair of lips brushed against his own. the other teased him, grazing his tongue on the edge of his lower lips not letting his lips to come fully in contact with the other.

jeonghan smirked in triumph when he felt the male's breathing increase its pace, and the other tried chasing his lips. he pulled away bringing his hands to cup his face, letting his thumb stroke his lower lip.

"you're so pretty hyuk."

he said sitting in his lap, not missing how the other gasped at sudden friction. pressing a light kiss on his jaw, he let his tongue swirl around, hearing the light moan escaping other's lips.

"just kiss me already jeonghan."

so he did, pressing a messy kiss on his lips. everything about the kiss was messy filled with lust and lacking the only thing jeonghan deemed he was incapable of, love.

their lips moved against each other, the sound of their tongue colliding and gliding into their mouth becoming louder.

jeonghan let his hands wander down taking the hold of the waistband of his jeans. he grinded his hips against minhyuk's who gasped instantly, the hard member pressing against his own.

"are you sur-"

before the older could finish his sentence, jeonghan had already slipped off his jeans leaving him only in his boxers. he hastily unbottuned his own jeans and slipped out of his shirt before falling in his lap again.

their clothed member pressing against each other, not making it any better for either of them to control themselves. jeonghan's hand wandered into his hairs while the older lifted him up and pressed him against the couch.

their lips pressed together for a while before the older leaned down and kissed his jaw, his shoulders, his neck and his collarbone.

"no hickeys."

jeonghan stated sternly to which the older nodded almost immediately, leaning down and slipping his hands into his boxers, getting hold of his already hard member.

"what the fuck is going on?!"

their heads jerked towards the door which was now wide open, the red haired male standing with his arms crossed against his chest.

"minhyuk? jeonghan? what the fuck are you two doing?"

jeonghan pushed the older away from him before snickering and pulling his shirt back on.

"what about josh-"

"yes what about him? just because he claims to be my boyfriend doesn't mean i can't sleep with someone i like."

"so you two are...?"

"we just happen to like each other's presence much more than i like hong's presence."

jeonghan stood up fully dressed, winked at minhyuk while glared at the older he once called his best friend.

"you ruined a good fuck cheol. i am never forgiving you for that."

"joshua needs to know what you're doing behind his back."

"he needs to realise i never liked him in the first place. not going to lie, he is really good in bed though."

before the older could retort a comeback, jeonghan turned heavy on his heels and dragged his now almost sober body towards the exit, fiddling with his car keys.

the ride back didn't take long and jeonghan was thankful he was now fully sober even though he reeked of alcohol.

"i am home."

he said in a monotonous tone not expecting a response in return, only to find the younger sprawled on the couch with a book dropped on his face, his hands on his chest interwined together.

jeonghan sighed softly lifting the book up and closing it before putting it on the table. he sat next to him, his hands lightly stroking the side of his face.

"y-you're back? awe you stink!"

the younger scrunched his nose in disgust before pushing him away lightly and then rubbing his eyes with the same hand, sitting upright.

"where were you this late?"

his eyebrows crinckled together and jeonghan had the urge to soothe them out but he didn't. he stopped himself.

"with friends. they were celebrating something, i don't remember what it was."

joshua nodded standing up from where he was sitting on the couch, taking the blanket along with him to his room.

"you should shower if you still want to sleep on the bed."

jeonghan nodded before leaning back onto the couch, his head heavy with the amount of alcohol he had. with droopy eyes and red cheeks, he knew he could easily pass off as being drunk and so the best idea to avoid the younger was to pretend to be passed out on the couch.

he brought his legs up, lying properly on the couch with his hands tucked under his head, a thousands of thoughts running in his brain at the same time.

one prominent smile stayed imprinted in his brain, flashing in front of his eyes. a new feeling found its way to his stomach, making him hold it firmly and close his eyes not liking the feeling at all.

"i hope seungcheol does tell you about what i did. i can't keep hurting you joshua."


	2. am i...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "i can't help but deny what i am feeling right now"

another night, another setting, another person but jeonghan found himself in the same situation all over again. he made sure not to drink even a drop of alcohol so as to not raise his supposed boyfriend's suspicions.

  


his hands roaming up and down on the back of the person holding tightly on his hips, fingernails digging into his heated skin. his lips ghosting over the other's neck, nibbling onto the skin.

  


what he hadn't expected was his boyfriend popping before his eyes, his smile prominent as if mocking his current situation. the uncalled situation jeonghan was trapped in right now.

  


the other male groaned as he moved his hands upwards, unbotting his jeans. his fingers messily roaming all over the place with one hand firmly gripping his thigh.

  


"you're still not hard, woah!"

  


"shut up junseok."

  


jeonghan desperately grinded his crotch against the other, the friction doing nothing but only increasing his frustrations. his eyes blindly looking around for one person even though he knew he wouldn't be found anywhere near him.

  


"stop it."

  


junseok pushed the male off his lap, lifting his shirt up and slipping it on immediately before glaring at the older.

  


"next time, call the right name."

  


in the midst of his brain wrapped around his own boyfriend, he hadn't noticed it has been an hour or so they had been on it. he failed to notice how the younger's name fell from his lush pink lips effortlessly, sounding soft and ever so light.

  


"fuck you joshua!"

  


༄

  


wrapping his arms around his built frame, snuggling closer and inhaling his scent had never felt so comforting to him before.

  


joshua had a different glow today and jeonghan did not fail to notice it. though his arms were aching with joshua laying his head on it for a long time, he didn't mind. for the first time, he didn't mind.

  


"jeonghan? are you asleep?"

  


immediately closing his eyes, he pursed his lips lightly not wanting the grin to appear and give out his _little pretend._

  


he felt the light cold fingertips of his stroking unknown patterns on his cheeks. the contact appearing and disappearing as if the younger's fingers were trembling. he suppressed the urge of clasping their hands together.

  


_"are you sure you're not in love with him yourself?"_

  


seungkwan's words kept repeating themselves and jeonghan groaned lightly in irritation. there's no way he would fall for the nerdy nerd joshua hong who went by jisoo a few years ago.

  


_"i am not in love with him."_

  


the words felt bitter. it felt like he was lying not only to the younger but also to _himself...?_

  


he couldn't deny his stomach fluttering whenever he looks at younger's eyeblinding smile, the smile that stretched from the corner of his lips and reaching the ends of his eyes, forming a perfect crescent everyone would die for. the skin below his eyes curving beautifully enhancing the already perfect smile.

  


he couldn't deny how his heart skips whenever the younger touched his hands, his hairs, his face or just simply held his body against his own.

  


he couldn't deny the disappointment he felt, whenever the younger would let go of him, the warmth rudely stripped off his body. he almost said he missed his body against his own only for the other to wrap him in his arms even more tightly.

  


_"you fought with your parents for him hyung and then ended up taking him back to your house to meet your parents. you haven't done that with anyone else before."_

  


he hasn't, he knows but the possibility of him admitting that he was in love with the other was in negative.

  


he wanted to prove to his friends that he could get anyone he wanted without him falling for the other. he wasn't that weak to fall in love with just anybody.

  


_"just anybody? are you sure he is just anybody to you hyung. you look at him like he is the most precious being, you literally have these heart eyes on whenever he is around. are you sure he is just anybody?"_

  


jeonghan did not like how his friends never believed a single sentence he uttered in denying his feelings for joshua. he wasn't in love with him, not at all. there was not even an ounce of feelings he felt towards the younger.

  


"jeonghan? what are you thinking so hard for?"

  


he felt the feathery fingertips of his boyfriend massaging between his eyebrows and he felt his entire body relaxing. it was weird and new sensation, jeonghan felt under his touch.

  


he flutter open his eyes finding the younger in close proximity, his warm breathe fanning against his cheeks.

  


jeonghan closed his eyes when he felt him cupping his jaw, leaning in. their lips meeting like it always did in a short, simple kiss but to jeonghan it felt like a whole new world was introduced to him.

  


his stomach going wild with his heart ringing near his ears, he feared the other would hear him which joshua did as he felt him putting his palm onto his chest, smiling into the kiss.

  


"you're cute."

  


he heard him whisper against his lips before smacking them again this time rather roughly that had jeonghan squirm at the sudden force. joshua chuckled yet again slipping his hands under his shirt, making him gasp at how warm his hands were despite the chilly weather.

  


"you're really adorable."

  


jeonghan felt as if his entire body was on fire when he looked up at joshua smiling widely, throwing endearments at him while hovering over his body looking hot as hell.

  


joshua was hot, he wouldn't lie. the amount of letter he had in his lockers back then when they were seniors in high school was even more than jeonghan. something that crushed his ego in pieces, he was envious he knew but for what reason, he never realised.

  


"you're perfect."

  


the words flew out of joshua's mouth as soft cotton candy, and jeonghan found the guilt growing bigger each passing second.

  


joshua dipped in peppering his face with kisses. he kissed his temple, his forehead, his eyelids, his nose, his cheeks, his chin and finally letting their lips meet in a soft sweet kiss that had jeonghan yearning for more when they parted.

  


his breathe became heavy when he felt the entire weight of joshua on his own body with his head resting on his chest, momentarily leaving kisses there.

  


he knew his heart was ready to erupt out of his chest any second. this feeling was new but not unfamiliar, he had heard about it in tales various time before, in stories his grandparents used to tell him. a feeling he never believed existed.

  


a feeling he yearned for, the feeling that became his greatest fear.

  


  


  


_i love him...?_


	3. is he still the one?

"what do you call a snake that is exactly 3.14 feet long?"

"seokmin, will you stop? not everyone is as smart as you, shut up!"

the taller male shifted his weight to the left leaning onto the brunette's shoulders, sliding the guitar off that sat atop his lap and chuckled, his deep voice resonating through the music room. 

"its like basic hyung. besides, i was just trying to make you laugh."

"you're puns are so unfunny, i would rather cry."

"fine! how are you though, haven't seen you in a while."

sighing softly, joshua let his fingers knead themselves in the younger's soft, almost faded red hairs. he remembers when seokmin first showed up with dark red hairs and everyone at their college went crazy over how attractive he looked.

what he couldn't forget is how minghao scoffed at his boyfriend getting unecessary attention he didn't need in the first place. a jealous minghao was a rare sight and seungkwan didn't forget to record it, even having the audacity of asking minghao to face the camera while rolling his eyes. 

"nothing much. how about you? how are you doing with minghao."

"its actually really good except for those occasional bickerings, it going pretty smoothely and i think he might be the one."

"you both have been together for like a year, don't you think its too soon to decide whether he is the one or not."

"not really. you just kinda know it in here."

seokmin points a finger to his own heart with his infamous smile brightening even more if its possible. joshua resisted the urge to pull onto the younger's cheeks. 

"how about jeonghan and you?"

"we are doing good but i don't know if he is the one or more like if i am still the one for him."

"what do you me—" 

joshua shook his head even before seokmin could complete his sentence, indicating that he would rather talk about anything else but this. 

joshua has known seokmin for about six years now but they weren't particulary close in the first three years. they were merely an acquintance who lived next to each other. 

having each other as neighbours wasn't much trouble until he met him in the party woozi threw as a celebration for him winning the musical performance held in their school. 

fast forward, seokmin got too drunk, forgot the password to his apartment and joshua had to let him stay at his apartment only for the other to break down in front of him, talking about how he didn't even make it to the final round of the musical. 

it was at that moment, joshua decided to protect the boy at any cost. it was not just his vulnerable state, with red cheeks and nose, tears streaming down his chin and his lips tucked out in a soft, heartbreaking pout but it was how pure the boy actually was. 

he kept whispering how he wasn't jealous of woozi at all and how happy he was for his hyung but he was disappointed at himself for not bringing out the same smile woozi managed to bring out of his parents. he kept repeating how he wanted his parents to smile brightly and tell him that 'they were proud of him'.

"seokmin?"

"i love you, y'know?"

"eww! hyung go away! why are you being like this?!?"

"lets go back to learning the chords, yea?"

seokmin nodded immediately, adjusting the guitar in his hands and smiling at the older as if to tell him he was ready. 

"now, show me how to play chord c." 

seokmin nodded alligning his fingers accordingly hoping for the distinct sound to come out but frowned when a sound mixed with other noises echoed through the big room that now seemed too empty and too scary to him.

"and that was actually pretty good for the first time."

"really?"

"yea but that wasn't chord c."

"hyung!"

seokmin whined loudly while joshua giggled ruffling the younger's hairs admiring his adorable expression. 

"let's go back. minghao might be worried." 

seokmin smiled nodding his head and putting his guitar in its case. turning his head towards joshua, his smile immediately dropped when he saw the older constantly checking his phone. 

they have been practicing for about five hours now and its already past nine. minghao had been continuosly blowing up his phone with texts asking when he will be back while joshua's phone had rang once and it was chan asking him if he wanted to hangout. 

no texts, no calls from jeonghan. 

seokmin had met jeonghan through joshua, remembering how they clicked instantly with the older teasing and joking once in a while with him. seokmin didn't mind because joshua and jeonghan were kind of alike but in a very subtle way that if you weren't observant much, you would miss it. 

what always irked him was how they treated each other. joshua was utterly in love with the older no doubt but he wouldn't say the same for jeonghan, at least not back then when they first started dating, not even when they celebrated joshua's birthday together. 

from what he remembered they had been dating for about eight months or so. he still gets into arguments with minghao who defends jeonghan and says he loves joshua as much as the other loved him. that wasn't true and seokmin knew it. 

he knows joshua knows it too and he just hopes the older would accept it soon. he wouldn't want one of his favourite person to get hurt. 

"hyung?"

joshua looked at him, his big eyes widening as he raised his eyebrows and smiled at him.

"lets go?"

joshua nodded slipping his phone in his pocket after typing something on it in a hurried manner. 

seokmin didn't spare a second before wrapping his arms around the older's shoulders, who chuckled and patted his back and raised his hands to ruffle his hairs, a habit he had caught from wonwoo. 

"you're okay, right?" 

"i am fine dokyeom, don't worry." 

seokmin smiled nuzzling his head into his neck for a second and then unwrapping his arms and gagging. 

"you stink."


	4. i am...!

mornings. jeonghan would admit mornings are something he would never be compatible with. letting go off his precious sleep and basically the only love of his life- his bed, was difficult, probably the toughest thing to do when you're clearly hung over with a constant somebody running through your mind.

his head heavy, regretting the amount of alcohol he had the night before. he let his vision become stable when he sat down properly, his back resting against the frame of the bed.

what felt weird was how cold he was. is this the normal temperature of the room or did someone just turn on the air conditioner during the month of november.

no, it was just the younger missing from his side, his contant whins when he didn't want to wake up, his arms wrapped tightly around his frame was missing.

"what the fuck jeonghan! stop thinking about him."

he messed his hairs, profanities leaving his lips when his gaze fell on the peach post it note stuck on the bowl covered with a thin plate on top of it. 

_'try not to drink on weekdays._

_hope the hangover soup helps._

_if it doesn't take the pills_

_kept right beside it._  
  


_AND STOP DRINKING ^_^'_

the contrasting emoji is what brought a smile on jeonghan's face, his lips stretching thin upward forming the beautiful smile, joshua adores.

"i hope cheol tells him. i can't continue this little pretend game."

taking the pills along with warm water, he threw the hangover soup in the sink and entered the washroom with a sigh.

_throwing away the soup without even tasting it is too harsh. just hope he doesn't asks about it later on._

༄

"hyung?"

the tall man with a new book in his hands, stood up greeting the older before sitting back in his own place. his glasses had managed to slip to the tip of his nose, making him look a lot more softer than before. his lower lip tucked out in a small pout when he saw the older not paying attention to him.

"josh asked me to go in this wine shop with him. he wanted to buy some."

"really?"

"yea. he said you aren't into wine that is why he didn't ask you, i guess."

jeonghan didn't plan to, he never did. if he went back in time to about a few months ago and told himself he would be feeling this unknown and certainly not unfamiliar feeling, he would have never believed it.

his eyebrows arched a little upward, his lips forming a small pout as he sat next to the younger who continued ranting about how he had visited wine shops with joshua before and how alike their tastes in wine were.

as minutes passed by and the younger seemed to have no plans of stopping any time soon, jeonghan grunted mentally not at minghao but at himself for feeling as dumb of a feeling as jealousy.

jealous.

jealous...?

was he really jealous of joshua's best friend just because they were spending time looking through wines and selecting their favourite ones?

in his defense, minghao was one of his best friends so he is probably just jealous of joshua taking up too much time from minghao that jeonghan seldom gets time to spend it with the younger.

yes thats what it is.

_"you can't continue to live in denial hyung."_

jeonghan let a curse slip off his lips and the younger immediately stopped talking, sensing that something was wrong with the blonde. his eyes filled with worry, his lips forming a frown looking absolutely adorable that jeonghan almost cooed at him.

"are you okay? did you hurt yo-Oh you look jealous."

to a stranger it would have seemed like minghao just stated it simply as if he was too used to it, like it was just a casual thing but jeonghan had known the younger too long to miss the slight hint of raised tone in his voice, clearly mocking jeonghan.

"where's your boyfriend though and how is he okay with you spending your entire day with joshua?"

"not when he himself spends his entire day with the same person. its like we are in a poly relationship except we are not and we just like hyung's presence a bit too much."

"thats a bit...okay, where is he though?"

"seokmin has been into guitars lately so he went to shua hyung to learn the basic chords."

"joshua knows how to play guitar?"

"the fuck hyung, i thought you already knew. its so obvious, he has like an entire collection of different guitars at his home, he even brought his favourite acoustic guitar to your shared apartment. how did you never notice?"

_because i was never home._

home. the word brought some extremely unsettling emotions from deep within his heart, engulfing the blonde in his thoughts once again. the guilt of never going back to joshua with as much happiness and love as joshua did to him. joshua had always called their apartment his home, his safeplace  
while to jeonghan it was just an apartment he shared with the younger, nothing less and certainly nothing more than that.

"you're doing that again."

jeonghan felt this sudden relief wash over his body, when he felt the familiar touch of his fingertips against his forehead. the same cold fingertips but that didn't make him flinch, instead made him relax with all the negative thoughts sinking away.

seokmin loud laughter filled the atmosphere making it even more light as he felt the male next to him chuckle softly at the younger couple.

seokmin engulfed the younger in his arms kissing his temple and then quickly pecking his lips to which minghao just giggled, smiling widely at him.

jeonghan looked at joshua who was busy looking at the other two, a small smile sat prominent on his lips.

oh how much he wanted him to dip down and peck his lips but he knew he would never do that. afterall it was jeonghan who asked not to kiss him in public even if it was as small as a quick peck.

he still remembers vividly how they got into an argument when joshua had kissed him in front of his friends and this guy he was planning to sleep with the next weekend, ruining all his foremost plans.

what reason he gave was dumb, he knew but joshua still agreed.

jeonghan looked at his palm playing with his fingers, his eyes momentarily looking up at the two who were being sickly sweet to each other. joshua used to be like that until jeonghan had asked him to stop.

"jeonghan?"

jeonghan raised his head in question towards the younger who was gripping on his shoulders lightly, his fingers stroking light circles on his collarbone.

joshua leaned in and pecked his lips lightly smiling right after, the same smile that made jeonghan's stomach twist and turn in response.

what he hadn't noticed was his own lips curling upwards in a sweet smile, his eyes crinkling at the edges, his cheeks dusted a shade of light pink.

"awe thats the smile i was looking for."


	5. his home

"i didn't tell shua."

the blonde sighed, running his fingers through his locks noting how the ends had gotten rougher than before. his fingers twirling the ends of his hairs, the image of joshua complimenting his hairs and how it smelled really good flashed before his eyes and he compelled them shut, sighing yet again.

"i figured or else i would be staying at your apartment right now after getting kicked out of joshua's apartment."

_he likes to call it their apartment even though its him who pays for it._

"no its because even if i told him, he would never believe me. i have known him since we were kids, he is too much into shits like 'a relationship without trust means nothing'."

jeonghan hated to admit that he felt a tiny bit of relief wash over him, it was as if he didn't want to lose it, lose him. joshua.

"you're his best friend, he would believe you over me anytime."

"you're his boyfriend, someone he holds dearly. please jeonghan, stop this bullshit. stop hurting jisoo, please."

"why are you so persistent? are you in love with that jerk or what? don't forget you're my best friend before his."

_jerk? really? who is the jerk here jeonghan, you know that clearly._

"no, jeonghan. joshua is my friend, he has always been even before you. it wasn't you who was with me while i went through elementary, middle school. it was not you who would rather not attend a party because i had an assignment due and you wanted to go with me."

"wow, is this some battle thing or what. find out who's the gonna be the next best friend thing?"

"i hope you know you're being a major dick right now. why did you drag this for eight months when you were never serious with him to begin with."

"i wanted to show everyone, i can get anyone and by anyone, i mean literal anyone to fall for me."

"is your ego that big that it can't be satisfied with anything less than a broken heart. stop this jeonghan or you're not only gonna hurt joshua but yourself too."

jeonghan breathe picked its pace as he stood up, feeling the harsh, cold wind hitting his face and slammed his fist against the table, the sound echoing loudly.

"i don't fucking care. don't act like it wasn't you and your stupid friends who started this."

"jeonghan, what is wrong with you?! they are not only my friend but yours too. heck! it was you who introduced me to them and trust me when they find out you're still wrapped over that small fucking thing then no one would be there by your side jeonghan. its you who is wrong here and no one else."

jeonghan rolled his eyes, taking out a few dollars and slamming it on the table before grabbing his phone and leaving the café ignoring all the judging stares thrown his way.

all he needed right now was a soju and a fucking human he can spend the night with.

stumbling on his own shoes, he cursed and rubbed his palm against each other. he forgot to bring the overcoat, getting too caught in midst of his argument with seungcheol. it was all seungcheol's fault.

cursing the weather under his breathe, he stepped into his car, turning the engine immediately and pressing open the heater.

it was at this rare moment, he missed how joshua would wrap his arms around his body, the warmth making him too comfortable for his own good.

driving through the busy roads of a weekend where the streets are filled with people, couples, children genuinely having fun, made him feel how lonely he felt even after being in a relationship and deep down he knew it was him who should be blamed for it.

pressing his foot onto the brakes, he raised his eyebrows slightly taking in the familiar surrounding. he clearly remembered putting in the address of the nearby club in his phone.

he shifted his gaze towards his phone, reading along the black lines, he doubted his own vision.

_home_ was what it was written and jeonghan doesn't remember putting it in.

what caught his attention was a familiar figure standing at the corner of the sidewalk, waving his arms vigourously at him, almost excitedly. the warmth of the familiar smile, raising goosebumps on his arms.

he unbuckled his seatbelt and almost ran towards the familiar person whose smile turned upside down upon realising the lack of warm clothes on jeonghan.

"i knew you would forget to take your coat. its good, i brought one for you."

jeonghan laughed before jumping into his warm embrace, inhaling the familiar scent, he had grown too accustomed to and probably liked it as well.

"this is way better."

"no jeonghan, wear this then you can hug me all you want."

"promise?"

"promise."

"i hope you don't break your promise then."

" _i don't break the promises, i make._ "

" _i know_."

jeonghan whispered under his breathe wearing the coat joshua had offered before, knowing exactly who it belonged to once the strong scent hit his nostrils and the sleeves fell past his fingers.

"you could have just brought my coat."

"i like it when you wear my clothes though."

"is it a permission for me to freely steal your hoodies?"

"you're literally wearing my hoodie right now. try being more subtle from now on."

jeonghan chuckled nervously looking down down at his outfit only to find he really was wearing joshua's hoodie, the gray one that made look joshua too domestic that jeonghan had the urge to steal it the very next day.

"oh, don't try change the subject now. you promised."

"fine, come here."

joshua opened his arms and jeonghan let himself be wrapped in the warmth yet again. a smile sat on his lips that he didn't even noticed or just decided to ignore it for the time being because for the first time, he felt all his worries leaving his body, he felt safe.

_he felt as if he was home._


	6. promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "don't make promises you can't fulfill."

the cold wind bit against his skin and jeonghan couldn't resist the urge to shiver and pulled himself closer to the nearest warm thing, which was joshua, his human heater.

a weird feeling sat beneath his heart, as he looked at the male. it would be an understatement to say he looked beautiful. the tips of his nose was red along with his cheeks that was now rosy due the biting wind. his red puckered up lips, gave him the perfect profile and jeonghan almost felt his heart stop at the realisation.

how did he never notice that.

now that jeonghan stood next to him, walking back to their apartment while wearing his hoodie and coat which smelled exactly like him, with joshua's scent lingering in the air as well gave him this unsettling feeling though he couldn't point what it was.

"stop staring."

"i-i am not staring. definitely not!"

"sure whatever you say."

instead of ignoring the older, joshua turned towards him slipping off his gloves and offering it to jeonghan who instantly shook his head in response.

"we are only five minutes away from _home._ you can wear that. it isn't even that cold."

"you're literally shivering, just wear it already."

jeonghan smiled softly, pouting at the younger extending his hand forward, who snickered in response putting the gloves on jeonghan's palm and walked forward with fast pace, the sound of jeonghan's footsteps and complains ringing near his ears.

"and you claim to be the more romantic one. you put the gloves on my palm just like that? should have put that on for me and then kept my hands in between your big ass hands and kissed it or something."

"what drama did you watch? please stop watching it. please!"

jeonghan rolled his eyes, pressing the password and hearing the sound it made as the door unlocked. their apartment welcomed with its warm embrace, to which jeonghan smiled.

"i can't believe its been 3 months since we started living together."

"right, it feels like you have been living here for decades with the way you leave your things unorganised. at least keep your shoes in place you dumbass."

"while every other couple call each other love, babe, sweetie and all those tooth decaying sweet nothings, i am limited to idiot, dumbass, jerk, fucker-"

"i literally never called you fucker."

"you did!"

"when did i-oh!"

"see, you can't even deny it."

"i would fight you right now but you look so adorable, i want to do nothing but squish your cheeks."

"don't you dare! your hands are freezing cold. get away from me you idiot!"

before jeonghan could run away, joshua already had his arms wrapped around the older who squirmed but gave up after about three minutes, sighing loudly and trying to annoy joshua by breathing right into his face.

"just let me hug you for a while, please."

jeonghan nodded ever so lightly and it was enough of a sign for the taller male to wrap his arms around his neck and nuzzle his nose into the crook of his neck, his cold lips coming in contact with the warm skin underneathe his shirt, that slipped off a little, displaying his shoulders.

"are you okay?"

"hmm, i will be in a bit. don't worry."

his fingers threaded themselves in his soft locks, stroking it softly as if that was the only thing he could do to comfort him.

one thing jeonghan knew joshua was good at was conceiling his emotions. after being with him for eight months, jeonghan knew it was impossible for joshua to always hide himself whenever he felt down or just a little hint of sadness. there was bound to be times where he would crumble down turning into a small ball of sobbing mess, leaving jeonghan with no option other than to embrace him hoping it would make him feel better.

it surprised jeonghan how he could feel the sadness seeping from joshua just by looking at his expression. he planned to ask him if he was okay right when he saw him standing in the middle of the road out of nowhere but resolved to another method of bringing the mood up hoping it would make the younger feel better.

joshua was the first one to let go, his gaze fixed on jeonghan as he smiled brightly.

"thank you."

he pecked his lips lightly before taking off his coat and hanging it before rushing to lie on the couch as if nothing happened.

sighing jeonghan made his way to the couch lifting joshua's head and sitting before putting it on his lap.

"you can talk to me."

"i know, its just i–" joshua stopped, his eyes closed, lips pressed together in a thin line. jeonghan let his hand wrap itself around joshua's while he played with joshua's hairs with the other.

"i am not gonna judge you if thats what you are worried about."

"ahh...i think my father has another family. he cheated on my mom. he has been for a few years now."

"you think?"

joshua nodded and turned to his right, slowly nuzzling his head into jeonghan's stomach.

if the situation had been any different, jeonghan would have pushed the younger away who clearly knew how ticklish he was.

"this is messed up, i know. my mom wouldn't stop crying. i just wish i could go there and hug her really tight and tell her she doesn't need that asshole in her life."

joshua let a single tear slip down his cheeks, sniffling as he remembered the tear stained face of his mom. he still couldn't get hold of the fact the once loving father of his would do such thing.

"awe baby, its gonna be okay. just know i am here,"

_don't make promises you can't fulfill._

"i will always be here for you."

"you promise?"

" _i promise_."

the words fell off his lips so naturally that it caught jeonghan off guard and he failed to notice the shocked expression on younger's face who was as surprised as him though he recovered much faster than him.

"my mom caught him and now i think they are gonna get divorced. i don't know what to do. i love my father, i really do but i don't think he is still the same person i first saw him as,"

jeonghan felt his lips going dry, his stomach sinking down and he could almost hear his heart trembling in fear. he had gotten so accustomed to the younger in the past three months, waking up to see his smiling face right in front of him or going to sleep with his head nuzzled in his chest, the sweet smell of his shampoo surrounding them, that he dared not to think about a life without him.

"it would have been so much better if he had just confronted my mom right away rather than lying to her. i know its easy to fall out of love and i wouldn't have blamed him if he had stayed honest with my mom. i want to be with her right now but i can't, she told me not to. she said she would visit me as soon as she was done with the paper works. i miss her so much right now."

his finger tips stroked against the soft skin of his cheeks, gently tapping the corners of his lips and planting a soft kiss on the edge of the curve. jeonghan took a breathe before preparing himself with a little prep talk.

oh how much he hated himself right now.

this was it!

"joshua, i have something important to tell y-oh! you fell asleep."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
